I joined facebook back in 2010, I think it was, and found myself posting there, geopolitical news I found significant, plus my own commentary. At the time I considered myself liberal, progressive, like all of my “friends,” both on and off facebook. In early 2011 I transitioned to a new website, exopermaculture.com for these commentaries, plus other types of commentary, all still, even now, aiming to “bridge/blend above and below” — and from then on I used facebook mostly to publicize each new exopermaculture post.
Meanwhile, gradually, my geopolitical allegiances had begun to mutate. Though progressive and liberal, I had never been truly a “Democrat,” but rather Independent, voting for the one I considered the least worst of the presidential candidates each election season. And each time, the least worst happened, I thought, to be Democratic; so I would file dispiritedly into the polling station to piss my small vote to into that stinky wind.
Meanwhile, also, around the same time that I joined facebook, I also stopped my print subscription to the daily New York Times, and instead, decided to check out all sorts of news sites on the internet, which is how I ended up doing the commentaries on the myriads of points of view I was finding there. I was aiming to thread my way through clickbait, misinfo and disinfo, to see if I could glean at least some modicum of “truth” on a daily basis, and meanwhile, to share with others, my findings.
Stopping the New York Times was a watershed moment, though I didn’t realize that at first. All of a sudden, my mostly blinkered (liberal, progressive) point of view dissolved into the swirling currents of an infinity of points of view that needed to be vetted or sourced. How? (Or, as Qanon would say, “How really?”) Is there any “factual” basis to anything? I’m reminded of a remark I made during the defense of my doctoral dissertation at Boston University in 1972: “The line between fiction and fact is very thin.” Though that statement may have seemed poetic at the time, 46 years later it looks prophetic.
Early on, I realized that “proving” any point of view, is impossible, since there is always a larger or deeper, or “other” context in which whatever is being discussed looks entirely different! What I could do, however, is follow a news source for awhile, and, in that way, begin to glean its, or his, or her, particular bias, way of approaching “reality,” expecially noticing what he or she or it leaves out, or pays close attention to, emphasizes, etc. In other words, rather than ask “what is true?” I began to ask, “what are so-and-so’s assumptions”? An example here, is my recent discovery that Jerome Corsi ( though I still feel he offers an exceedingly valuable and informed point of view), given what he calls his “biblical” foundation, is as much a fundamentalist as any radical Muslim! What? I ask myself, Does he not see this? And does he not recognize that fundamentalism, of any kind, is the problem?
In those early years I suffered from cognitive dissonance, since I was both paying attention to “progressive” alternative sites, while also very much noticing anything that had to do with child trafficking, pedophilia, etc.
Progressive sites did not discuss pedophilia. That glaring omission disturbed me greatly, and thus my own cognitive dissonance. I had been what we now call “red-pilled” on that horrific issue with Kathy O’Brien’s book, Trance Formation of America, way back in the late ’90s. At some point I began to consider pedophilia, and by extension, Satanism, as the main source of corruption that has held most sectors of society, from top down and bottom up, in that trance, via blackmail for those implicated, and via denial, for those who refuse to even imagine that such a horrific reality is possible!
Then Trump came along, a bombastic, bloviating, narcissistic capitalist megabusinessman who has, however, signalled that he is highly aware of the pedophilia issue. I started to pay attention to his tweets. Which brought me to twitter, too. Though I had signed up way back when I signed up for facebook, I had not activated my twitter account. Not until a few months ago! Lurking on twitter, I notice that those I decide to follow are all basically “red-pilled,” which means, usually, that they are also pro-Trump.
So here I am, with facebook and twitter accounts, and the people that I surround myself with in these virtual realities inhabit totally different political realities! My friends on facebook are by and large still liberal, progressive, and hate Trump with a downright scary passion. Those I follow on twitter on the other hand, are by and large “conservative,” and thus mostly pro-Trump.
Who am I inside this swirling cacophony of screaming voices?
Mostly, I ignore the liberal vitriol on facebook, since the few times I did take issue with anti-Trump comments, it started a huge outcry, and I simply don’t have time or inclination to argue. Also, I am very aware that the massively pro-Trump broohaha of those I “follow” on twitter feels like a tiny, most likely somewhat misguided, slice of the opinion pie. Plus, in the main, the atmosphere, at least among the ones I follow on twitter, feels decidedly “mean.” As nasty as the anti-Trumpers on facebook!
And yet, I do find myself going to twitter first, for “breaking news.” That’s new. I used to try to do the same thing with facebook, but “breaking news” is not as likely to be found there, amidst all the selfie commentary.
Meanwhile, I’m working in my own way to get the level of vitriol in our society to lessen. I’m paying attention to when and where and how I personally get “triggered” — and work through the feelings that come up, rather than jump immediately to conclusions and blame someone or some situation in the “outside world” for being ignorant or wrong, or stupid, or just plain pig-headed!
Yes, noticing all the feelings, and my crying need to “duke it out” with so-and-so, to shake him or her or them to their senses, to “red pill” them by force! Instead yes, I notice the strong uncomfortable feelings, and breathe through them to the point where they begin to dissolve, so that I can again listen to the still small voice of intuition pointing me personally in the direction I am meant to go, all the while sensing the myriad points of view swirling around me without getting caught up or identified with any of them.
Hello Ann Kreilkamp, I have been reading some of your posts for about six months and appreciate your efforts at being conscious of light AND shadow. I’m fairly certain you have read or studied Carl Jung; recently a friend encouraged me to buy a copy of Jung’s Red Book edited by Sonu Shamdasani. Before delving into it I have been re- reading Memories, Dreams, Reflections and have been stunned and delighted to see how relevant Jung’s thoughts are for us today. I am eager to see what else my friend and I can discover in the Red Book; we are starting a study group. Thank you for what you do. Best wishes, Marnie Vail
Marnie, how lovely! Jung’s Red Book is on my wish list, as the full color one is quite pricey, and I’ve been a book buying fiend the past year. You might like the work of Becca Tarnas if you’re not already aware of her: https://laurabruno.wordpress.com/2018/03/28/becca-tarnas-dissertation-defense-of-the-back-of-beyond-the-red-books-of-c-g-jung-and-j-r-r-tolkien/
I’ve followed her dissertation prep for years, and that link is to her fascinating dissertation defense concerning the Red Books of Jung and J.R.R. Tolkien, both of whom wrote about light and shadow.
Ann, I appreciate that you straddle the lines and bridge the gaps. I really sense that’s the main way forward in this otherwise vitriolic world. Real food, creativity and love … if we can find ways to share those things, we can recognize the humanity in each other and finds roads (or portals) to a New Earth. Or simply create one from our deepest dreams. Thank you for sharing your dilemma, one which I share, though not via social media. The last time I voted straight party line was in 1999 with a brain injury, when I voted for Sen. Dick Durbin, who has tried for nearly two decades to ban or restrict all the supplements that helped me recover from my TBI when BigPharma almost killed me.
Live and learn!
Aha, just looked up Becca Tarnas, wondering if she is related to Rick Tarnas, and aha! she’s his daughter. He is another author you should read, Laura. Especially good on historical and cultural events and currents as shaped by outer planet transits.
Yes, I have been meaning to get some of his books, too. She is, indeed, his daughter, and what a magical upbringing she had!
Wow, a study group for the Red Book. Perfect! And I bet you’re the only one in the whole world.
Yes, very familiar with Jung. And for awhile there in my late thirties and early forties, he was one of the few authors who basically, helped save my life, save the aliveness in me, reignite it!
Ann, how similar are worlds are. A foot in each dimension, world, etc. like you I was red pulled a long time ago but feel quite buoyed by the apparent movement forward of the waking masses. Still too slow for my liking but my aware self is now coming back out of hiding or the chrysalis phase to start interacting with humanity at large again. I love your blog and so appreciate you being here right now! Thank you and hugs xxxx
Lisa! Thank you so much. We are kindred spirits, and hearing from you warms my heart and excites my spirit!
Hi Ann!
Just wanted to chime in again that I’m doing the same thing you are re: finding truth, and that sitting with my feelings, as you do, is very helpful…when I can get “unstuck”, anyway.
I find it is also VERY important to not identify with my beliefs; and to always drill down to WHY I feel certain ways about things because that leads to said beliefs, which I then examine to see if they need ‘pruning’ or not. I thank GOD that I was not raised in a strict religious setting, because I don’t know if I could have ever dealt with that level of programming!!
Oh, and something else that I found interesting re: “Trance-formation”: have you ever read these comments about Mark Phillips of the Kathy O’Brien book?
http://www.rense.com/general2/phil.htm
Yes, it’s Rense, but there are some things mentioned there that gave me pause. It might be possible that O’Brien is a ‘limited hangout’ and is actually *still* a CIA MKULTRA handler, and that Cathy has just been ‘reprogrammed!’
Yeah I know, more monkey mind stuff!! But what the heck 🙂
p.s. I have only voted twice in my life: once for Jesse Jackson (gag!), and again for Obummer (puke!). NEVER AGAIN!!!
Thanks again Ann!
You are truly a 21st century Renaissance (or should I say Resonance) woman.
“Let all the people rise up & say AMEN!”
k
Wow! Thanks, Kelley. I’m both flattered and honored to be a 21st century “resonance woman.” YES! You must be too, or you wouldn’t recognize me!
Ok then! Now it’s my turn to be flattered & honored. I’m smiling as I write this as i’m sure my deceased mother must be also. She was my introduction to strong, self-educated, nearly indestructible feminine spirit (she was Pisces btw) but I am a 76 year Aquarian male who has struggled all my life to make sense of male/female relationships in a culture that poisoned the water for all relationships a long time ago. But thanks in large part to another courageous, free spirited (Libra) woman from Slovakia I met & married 21 years ago this past week, my mental/emotional/spiritual universe is well on its way to being mended in a way i could never have imagined. And there is a strange synchronicity between what you blog & what we are discovering on our own. Community in diaspora perhaps but community nevertheless.
Love it! And love you both. Such strange, wondrous times we live in, eh?