Re: Covington Kids: wearing a MAGA hat is dangerous!

Would I dare wear one? Do I dare even to put a Q sign on my car window? Don’t think so; not in Bloomington, Indiana, a left-leaning (and left-learning) academic town.

Never in my 76 years do I remember a time when I would actually fear for my life if I wore a certain article of clothing in public. The phrase Trump Derangement Syndrome really does feel meaningful. If I do get a MAGA hat, and wear it out in public, I will at least take someone with me to record my encounters.

But then, why would I encourage such nonsense? Can’t we all just get along? For example, in this household, and in our Green Acres Permaculture Village, neither my housemates, nor any of our other podmates, feel the same way I do; they all have their own divergent points of view on the entire chaotic political scene that we are more and more subjected to by the media. Of course! We don’t necessarily “think alike” here — how could we, since we’re all siloed into whatever “news” we individually pay attention to on our screens — though we do aim to love and cooperate, no matter what.

And that’s the trouble: the MSM pounces on “bad news” in order to divide us. This has been the case for decades, though becoming glaringly obvious now. I can remember mentioning this fact to my then newspaper-editor husband Dick, way back in the mid-70s, wondering why his newspaper didn’t go after “good news.” It doesn’t sell newspapers, was his simple answer. Though he was in charge of editorial, the advertising side of the paper ruled the overall framework through which his reporters could view what is happening.

Forty years later, I’m paying attention to how USA Today spins this Covington Kids story (since USA Today is included as “national news” in the local Herald-Times). First noticed a post yesterday that pretended to give more perspective on the event, but ended up subtly and not so subtly blaming the kids anyhow. Then, today. Disgusting. Plus not mentioning that the silver-tongued Native American activist “veteran,” identified on zerohedge as an serial “outrage-culture grifter,” did not not only serve in Vietnam, but went AWOL three times!




I can’t find this article on-line, but here’s another version.

It all sounds so reasonable, unless you realize that the Indian “activist” approached the boys, who were just standing there, apparently doing what kids do, whooping and hollering while waiting for their scheduled bus, plus chanting school songs to drown out a bunch of other strange, nasty sounding “Black Hebrew Israelite”  activists who had been baiting both them and the Native Americans? Not sure about that. Not sure about any of this. All I know is there are at least three “factions” in this viral story, and that long and short iphone videos and the press and twitterers have been spinning out lots of more or less judgmental interpretations ever since, blaming one faction or another, or all three.

To my mind, the student’s claim that he kept calm in order to try to defuse the situation made perfect sense. Who knows what this latest false flag is going to engender next. It’s time we all claimed our own internal sovereignty and stop blaming anyone else for whatever “happens” in the outside world that the media can then pick up and run with in order to continue to stir up chaos.

The March for Life:  I’m personally “against” outlawing first trimester abortions, knowing that abortions will take place no matter whether they are lawful or not, so why not make them safe? Let’s face it: nobody likes abortion — except those who sell bodies and body parts. And if Planned Parenthood does that, then yes, that must change. But women have been getting pregnant, and sometimes deciding that now is not a good time to bring up a child, forever. It’s part of life on earth.

On the other hand, I’m all for marching for life, for all life, for the life force, and how it seeks to move through us, generating and regenerating truth and beauty and love forever.

In any politically fraught situation, when certain factions aim to take advantage in this feverish social-media dominated world, they can: “news” goes viral instantaneously. Which means: Each of us must find and hold our own center, love and cooperate with those close to us, remain open-minded (not get locked into dogmatic “beLIEfs” which can be used to divide us), and tread in the wider world gingerly, at this point, until further notice.

Remember: this is the ultimate aim of Agenda 21, Agenda 30, the New World Order: To erase all national borders, encouraging total flux and instantaneous mixing of cultures, which DOES cause chaos. Then, in order to calm things down, the aim is for the world’s peoples to eventually be grateful when the centralized police state clamps down, and produces the “order” we have all been longing for, turning us “deplorables” into indentured slaves.

Each of us CAN take back our sovereignty, but we have to realize that we are losing it, to do so.

Later, same day: Just in, please not just read, but please savor! an essay via David Coulter, POWER OF THE SOVEREIGN SPIRIT, by Neil Kramer. It is magnificent!  In Comment section, below.

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Slightly over one month ago, on December 16th, 2018, I posted the 12th chapter of a new e-book that will document an extraordinary three-day journey from 2008: BACK WHEN I WAS DYING. 

AK Reader, E-Book (posted as a series), BWIWD: Chapter Twelve, A BIRD’S EYE VIEW OF OUR CULTURE, Part 1

I now present the three penultimate chapters. One more, in the form of a yet-to-be-written Appendix, remains. Once all these are up as a series, I will make an e-book out of the whole. Thanks for your patience!

So interesting, after so many delays, this latest one. Of course, Christmas did intervene, and my travels to Massachusetts. And once I got home I had a cultural emergency to attend to that is still ongoing, but a way through has appeared. More about that perhaps later, much later!

In any case, here are the final three chapters. The APPENDIX, which I have only begun to work on, will throw a new and illuminating light on the entire corpus. 

Thanks to Reader and Commenter Ann Dimitrelias, for her nudge to get back to work on this long intimate tale.

First, remember the full title of the entire series:


Meditation on a Three Day Ordeal/Epiphany/Assignment

© Ann Kreilkamp 2008

Also, you might want to check back to see the Table of Contents.

P.S. Note the photo below. This particular Central Park bridge is, believe it or not, germane to the tale.




Chapter Thirteen



Everything I have written up to this point took place within the first few weeks of that arduous inner journey of April 13-15, 2008 during which my life picked itself up and set itself on a new foundation. As you can see, and as shown in the Table of Contents, I began with narrative (THE SETUP, scenes 1-3, and THE DISCOVERY) and then, after several JOURNAL interludes, abruptly segued into deep psychological, sociological, philosophical, and cultural inquiry that went on and on — and on!

Intuitively, I felt I needed to widen the perspective in order to situate that three day ordeal, epiphany and, it would turn out, assignment, within the specific micro and extended macro context that might, hopefully, illuminate for the reader the personal (and social, cultural) significance of the experience.

But then, deep contextual burrowing completed, for some unknown reason I set the manuscript aside, unfinished. Not that I decided to set it aside. Simply, that’s what I did. Something else caught my eye.

But why? That’s not like me. I always finish whatever I start — and quickly!

I have often asked myself this question.

Indeed, ever since 2008 I have picked up this manuscript every two years or so, only to find myself disoriented, bogged down, in reading it. Each time I would shake my head in puzzlement. I couldn’t finish the story! Couldn’t switch back from contextualizing to narrative, unspooling the second and third days of the experience. Why not?

Aha, now, in late 2018, with perhaps the fifth reading of this pesky manuscript, I do realize why. The answer comes in the final paragraph, where I hinted that I knew of a language that would help make sense of my experience.

What was (and is) that language? Well, if you know me, you might guess: astrology. If you don’t know me, let me say here that I have worked as a professional consulting and teaching astrologer since the mid-1970s! But now, from the vantage point of late 2018, I realize that I do not want to include astrology in this manuscript. This too, is unlike me, as I often find myself weaving threads of this ancient symbolic language into my writing process.

But this time, I would rather just finish the story of days two and three and leave it at that. Leave astrology out of it. Let the reader make what he or she will of the story in its entirety, and be satisfied myself that, at last, I have been able to finish my recounting of that three-day transformation.

[Several days later]: Oh, but wait! Yes I do want to include astrology, just not inside the story itself, but rather, as an Appendix. Why? Because I now realize that the ten-year span between unfinished manuscript in 2008 and the task of completing it in late 2018 is stunningly astrological in its implications. But: those implications couldn’t have been recognized then, ten years ago; and frankly, I sense that I — and we — can only barely begin to comprehend them now.

What am I talking about? Wait and see. Finish the story first, then, if curious, check out the astrology. You might be glad you did, for it gifts another, almost haunting dimension to this personal tale.

Okay, but . . .

Astrology aside, why couldn’t I just have finished it up in late 2008, by continuing the story of day one through days two and three? As I said, I usually do tell personal stories from beginning to end. They flow out, like rivers. But this one did not. Instead, it began to flow, and then got flooded with contextual considerations necessary to advance the plot.

Too bad, because at that point, the memories were still fresh, very fresh, On the other hand, though no longer fresh and detailed, they are in still very strong in skeletal form, ten years later.

Back then, I could have gone into heartfelt detail in relating various conversations, mostly on the phone with family and old friends, while approaching death from pancreatic cancer.

Instead, I can only rely on memory of fleeting moments from long-distance conversations with two family members that return to me now, ten years later. Interestingly enough, these two, my father and one of my sisters, have both since died — and yet I live on!

I remember especially one telling moment from my discussion with Dad, a medical doctor. “What about pain,” he had asked, plaintively. “Would you like something for pain?” I had already told him I didn’t want medical care. That I wanted to die on my own terms, and consciously. His question came from a deep, compassionate, almost wrenching place within himself. I very much appreciated the question, and especially his tone, and of course it made me think. Did I want medicine to alleviate or numb pain?

Like everyone else, he too was very much on board once I related my experience of being in the hospital ER, and how I had opened to the special atmosphere and process of dying. His concern for pain demonstrated both his caring and his expert understanding of typical physical symptoms attending pancreatic cancer.

The other conversation I especially remember was with my sister Mary who had suffered on and off from various forms of cancer herself for nearly 40 years before she finally died a few years after I did not. When I called her, she instantly warmed to the conversation, turned effortlessly effusive, and launched into gratitude, singing my praises. “You were my real mother when I was growing up!”

“Huh?” This surprised me.

“Yes, you paid more attention to me than Mom ever did.” (Keep in mind that Mom had eight children, and so was inherently distracted from any single one of them.) “One time we were playing scrabble, and I came up with an unusual word. You told me I was smart!” she exclaimed, still clearly relishing that moment when I had affirmed an aspect of her that she very much needed.

Oh wow, just as I am thinking back to the 2008 experience here in late 2018, sitting in the same chair as ten years ago, these two memories flood to the surface.

I ended up calling both parents, my six sisters, and both my brothers on that first afternoon. Something made me do it. I felt utterly compelled. During each extended conversation my sibling and I would dive into an intimate world specific to the relationship the two of us had held since childhood. We were communing, our hearts and psyches synchronized with the intensely powerful experience that I was recounting — and undergoing!

With each sibling, initial shock gave way to spaciousness, almost relaxation. Gratitude for our extraordinary, heartfelt connection. A sense of mystery, depth, the sacred. With each discussion, I could feel the atmosphere of love palpably expanding, deepening. None of us were holding back. All of us were right here, right now, present in this precious moment, attuned to one another and to my dying process.

On the second day I continued the phone conversations, first with the most difficult calls, those to each of my two sons, Sean and Colin.  I’m surprised that I don’t remember the contents of our discussions, or even our tone. I have a feeling that I am actively blocking my memory of the pain that I sensed in them, their terrible, wrenching struggle to accept what I was asking of them. The three of us had been separated for a long time during their childhood, and though we had gotten back together again, the breach had not fully healed. So how could I go and die on them?

After that, I continued the easier interplays — with one of my former husbands (the other three were already dead!), plus former lovers and dear old friends from childhood and various phases of adulthood.

During these soulful meetings, at some point during this second day I found myself visualizing a certain bridge in New York’s Central Park, one that husband Jeff and I had walked under during an autumn vacation in 2002, a year or so before his death of a heart attack. I imagined this bridge buttressed horizontally with a narrowing energetic channel directed towards it, just as ranchers funnel animals into what gradually turns into a chute. In my imagination, the chute ended where the tunnel under the bridge began. And I knew: Upon entering that tunnel, there would be no return.

During the second day of that three day period, I saw myself, having entered that narrowing energetic channel, being gradually nudged towards the tunnel.

Meanwhile, intuitively, and very very strongly, I knew that my task was to continue to connect with loved ones, helping them process and transform initial shock into what I still vividly remember as the inviting spacious sweetness beyond. Until I entered the active dying process, I was to spend my time this way, conversing with loved ones, so that we could all open together into the same loving atmosphere.

Towards the end of the second day, after I had finally gotten off the phone, I was in the middle of my regular, daily, hour-long, late afternoon yoga/chikung/tai chi practice when I gradually became aware of being surrounded by spirits — guides, angels, whatever you want to call them. I could sense them crowding around, excited, as if raising their hands to clink glasses with each other, congratulating themselves. Why?

Instantly, clearly and with not a scintilla of doubt, I knew: they had wondered what would happen if one person, knowing she was dying, and accepting it, was also willing to not just talk about it with friends and family, but in her conversations with them to actually inoculate her entire social sphere into a unified expanding field of universal LOVE. 

Would that work? Furthermore, could that transformation be accomplished quickly?

In other words, this was an experiment. These beings in the spirit world needed someone in the 3D world who was not afraid of dying to offer herself as a subject. I fit the bill.

Now imagine this three-day pilot project scaling up. Imagine an entire society beginning to enter the dying process, due to some incoming or ongoing, or near, and inevitable catastrophe that everyone either consciously knows about or unconsciously senses. A possible extinction level event or quickly developing process. Could a massive transformational field of love be quickly generated inside that larger context?

So then I ask myself, is this why I was given the wherewithal to finish this manuscript now, ten years later, when all of us are feeling totally on edge, knowing that something major is approaching, and we don’t know what it is; all we know is that when we look around, most of us are furious, irritable, and increasingly violent, in both words and deeds, seeking to blame the other for what feels like a fiery conflagration in our own hearts.

And further: might it be that those of us who are consciously aware of what we are facing, could generate a massive field of love so very powerful that it would alter an otherwise inexorable timeline? In other words, because of our conscious communion, and because of our commitment to help those not yet conscious, what had promised to be an extinction level event might be either miraculously averted or transformed? — Or not! And might it be that either way it wouldn’t matter? For we were, and we are, LOVE. The usual barrier, between me and you, between life and death, dissolves.

Again, might the conscious among us, we who discover that we do not fear death, in waking up together, and helping others to wake up too, simultaneously recognize how much we need and value each other’s company — and indeed, each other’s full personal expression and fully mutual cooperation — so that from now on, from this singularity point on, we easily continue to accept and nourish this sweet liquid field of universal love?



Chapter 14



On the morning of the third day, I had an appointment with a doctor. He prescribed an MRI exam, which, wouldn’t you know, revealed that the growth in question was not in the pancreas, but in the liver! — where, he said, “it’s probably no big deal.”

And so there I was, after this apparent, and very intense and transformational dying process, the experience itself fully felt and fully accepted, suddenly released again to live. Resurrection!

Which meant, of course, that I would have to call everybody back, and let them know that I was not dying, after all. That took the rest of the third day. You can imagine the relief, and the laughter. 



Chapter 15



In order to ease the worry of the medical profession, I agreed to submit to a sonogram every three months, both to check on the ovarian cysts, and to monitor the size of that “fibroid tumor” in the uterus that had “a larger blood supply than we would like.”

Myself? I wasn’t worried. As I told them, I’ve probably had all these growths in me for 30 or 40 years, and will most likely die with them, not of them.

Nearly three years later, the doctor who had been administering the sonogram finally admitted that I was right. I would probably die with them and not of them. “Come back for one final check, a year from now,” she told me. But when I called a year later to make my final appointment, I was told that the doctor herself had died! Some kind of fast-growing cancer, the receptionist said. She had been in fine health, was a runner, and only in her 40s.

During that same period of time, I had also been seeing a naturopath on a regular basis. But then, when I called to make another appointment with him, was told he had also died! He had been chainsawing wood, and a large branch fell on him from above. This happened near his home in the forest. His friends had found his body.

So here I am now, ten years later and going on 76 years old, the spent lives of two family and two medical helpers strewn behind me — and I’m still alive, still kicking! What’s next?

What new and transformative process will I engage in that might further assist me, and my beloveds, to absorb, integrate, and move through this climactic era in human history?







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Tonight’s Supermoon, “Blood Moon” Total Lunar Eclipse, is visible over the Americas and western Europe

Given its visibility, it will have more effect here, rather than say, Asia, Russia, or New Zealand. BTW: this is the last full blood moon to be visible in North America until 2022, and the final blood moon for the entire earth until 2021. So it’s a big deal!

In Bloomington, Indiana, the Sun opposite Moon clicks into place astrologically at 12:14 AM 1/21/18. See:

I’ve noticed a lot of astrological falderal, pointing out how this Full Moon features “20” aspects, or some such. Well, all I can say about that is, the aspects that are important have been in place for awhile now: Saturn/Pluto, Eris/Uranus/Mars, Venus/Jupiter, Mercury/Pluto, and that only the Mercury/Pluto aspect (powerful/Pluto communication/Mercury) actually aspects the Full Moon in any way, with a wide conjunction to the Sun. In other words, this Full Moon, no matter how strong it is, does not trigger the four ongoing conjunctions; they’ve already been having their say!

Meanwhile, however, the fact that this Full Blood Moon Lunar Eclipse happens to fall at 0° Aquarius/Leo IS significant, for it begins to propel us into a hopefully wider, more spacious (Aquarius is an air sign) point of view than the polarized, walled-off, concretized atmosphere that Capricorn engendered during this past month of the USG partial shut down. In, other words, I presume that, within the next few days, we are going to see some “progress” in a more round table, Aquarian approach to the issues we face as a nation — at least for the  next month while the Sun is in Aquarius! After that, the Sun will move into Pisces, and again, of course, a subtle shift in atmosphere; hopefully, the final Piscean phase of the astrological year will help us absorb emotionally, psychically, spiritually, whatever has been talked about (and agreed upon?) during the Aquarian phase. Finally, of course, one month later, March 21st, we reach 0°00 Aries, our annual NEW BEGINNING on the Spring Equinox — of whatever!

The Leo Moon: hopefully more leaders will rise to the occasion, and not leave everything that matters up to Trump, Pelosi, and whoever else has been foolish enough to grab the spotlight and hang on for dear life! The more real leaders with courage to express their own heartfelt selves, the wider that Aquarian table, and the more inclusive our mutual understanding and cooperation.

Sabian symbols for 1° Aquarius and Leo:

It’s clear that we who are alive on Earth now are about the business of radically and thoroughly restructuring the way humans relate with both each other and the natural world. Tearing down and rebuilding old structures is part of it. “Old adobe missions” (with their shades of colonial and religious dogmatism and intolerance) may no longer be viable in the emerging new world.

Also key: to summon and energize our inherent vitality for the enormous task at hand. And, despite New Age rhetoric, we need to remember: there’s nothing inherently “wrong” with ego. Without the Leonine ego, what would get done? I think of the ego as a focusing mechanism, the interface between the still, mysterious depths of our inner lives and the “10,000 things” continually whizzing by in the outside world. We utilize ego in order to marshal our energies into directed action.


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Corrected Presidential Announcement Time, and Laura Bruno perspective

Note: see yesterday’s post.

I kept close track of when President Trump actually arrived at the podium and began to speak, 4:07 p.m. So I did a chart for that time, and Laura Bruno is correct, it puts wounded healer Chiron on the midheaven (see her commentary below).

This chart also puts 16°41  Cancer on the Ascendant. Sabian symbol for 17° Cancer: THE SEED GROWS INTO KNOWLEDGE AND LIFE.

Notice that for this chart the closing Saturn/Pluto conjunction straddles the Descendant (on the right hand side of the horizon). The Descendant in the chart signifies The Other, in this case, those “opposed” (Saturn) to Trump (his Pluto, his power), no matter what he does or says! Which became clear shortly, when Nancy Pelosi categorically refused his bi-partisan offer to end the shutdown by incorporating many Democratic suggestions into his proposal to build the wall where needed on the border with Mexico.

He did speak in a Cancerian manner (the Ascendant, where the entity meets the world, is in Cancer), compassionate and kind, not at all oppositional, especially stressing the “American family,” and how he had just joined a group of newly naturalized citizens, welcoming them into the “American Family.”

The Mars connection, that I expected to be more forceful, given it’s exact square to Saturn, was held in check. And instead, one might say, David’s first stone was converted into a seed, which “grows into knowledge and life.” In other words, it’s not really obvious that David is confronting Pelosi’s deep state Goliath — YET. I have a sense that as Mars marches from Saturn to Pluto, reaching it by early February (see yesterday’s post), that David’s stone will be thrown; furthermore, by that time it will be obvious that Trump, by playing his cards in this expansive, bi-partisan, moderated form, will have exposed Nancy’s stonewall approach to whatever Trump suggests as totally unreasonable, thus opening the way to getting the wall, even with Emergency powers, if necessary. Probably won’t be necessary, as I imagine her rigid attitude is beginning to alienate even even many Democrats.

By the way, the other aspects I mentioned yesterday, Venus/Jupiter and Mercury/Pluto, are, of course, still present in the corrected chart.

Laura Bruno:

The biggest thing I notice with this start time is that Chiron — the Wounded Healer — is exactly conjunct the Midheaven, just 6 minutes apart in the 28th degree of Pisces. We’re in the last degree of Capricorn, but almost the last degree of Chiron in Pisces, a perfect time for spiritual healing. With Pisces being a sign of no boundaries and the issue being one of borders, the discussion of Angel Mom’s and those who’ve been wounded by the humanitarian crisis was the right focus to make the most of these energies.

By starting seven minutes late, Saturn the patriarch dropped back into the 6th house of work and health instead of sitting right on the Descendant at 4 p.m. With Saturn that close to the Ascendant/Descendant axis in Cancer/Capricorn, there’s still a need to integrate the polarities between mother/father, feminine/masculine, and issues of safety and boundaries. Saturn wants structure and firm boundaries, but Cancer has its shell. Both signs, though opposite, have potential for integration.

Will that integration happen? With Uranus in very late Aries in the 10th house, exactly square the Sun, there remains a lot of public volatility and potential for surprises. I see that at 4:07 p.m., Uranus was exactly Trine a 6th house Part of Fortune at 27 degrees 53 minutes Sagittarius. So we’ve got Saturn and the Part of Fortune both in the 6th house, with this President who loves to work, who’s positioning himself as having worked very hard every day through the shutdown, including on Christmas, while Pelosi et al. have been traveling and partying. Whether or not you like President Trump, the energies of this talk time supported this narrative.

Tenth house Uranus Trine 6th house Part of Fortune underscored the energy of thinking outside the box, trying to factor in highest good of all; however, that Uranus in late Aries energy was going to bring up some charges of tyranny, irascibility and refusal to accept authority, regardless of what he said or how he said it. The offer to extend DACA for three years seems like a “brotherly love” kind of 10th house Uranus offer, an offer made knowing it will likely be rejected. Service is a key to 6th house Part of Fortune happiness, and this Trine alignment with Uranus supported a potential to shift the understanding of him as someone who finds happiness in serving the country. Again, whether or not you agree with DJT’s politics or style, it’s a fact that he has sacrificed enormous wealth (minus 1 billion) to work for $1 per year, donating his salary, while previous presidents and other public “servants” lined their pockets with millions to hundreds of millions of dollars. This 4:07 p.m. announcement time supported maximum chance to offer healing and a change of perspective. It reminds me of the Hanged Man card in Tarot, with the idea that soon, things will right themselves as perspective shifts.

The other big thing I noticed was the 12th house Moon at 10 degrees, 42 minutes Cancer. This time offered major potential to channel the emotions of the collective unconscious. The Moon has a lot of Contra-Parallel aspects, emphasizing the complexities of heightened emotions. With the Moon in its home sign in the watery, unconscious, karmic 12th house, the emotions are bigger than this moment or this topic. This is a messy topic dealing with so many unseen details. Many people want to bury their heads in the sand … or crawl into the Cancer shell rather than address the full complexity of these questions, issues and feelings. How can we care for everyone’s needs? How can we, as a nation, find ways to balance emotions, since the 12th house Moon can create emotional filters that people mistake for truth or logic.

I would be remiss to ignore Black Moon Lilith (True) in any talk about refugees, immigration, rape, murder, children, abortion, sovereignty, boundaries, sexual abuse and/or ritual satanic abuse. She was not majorly aspected at this time, but I’ll copy in the description of her placement according to

“Lilith (True) in Aquarius

[Ann here: in order to get Chiron on the chart, my astro program sacrificed True Lilith. Sorry! Just imagine that she does sit in the 8th house as you read Laura’s views on this potent point that whiz kid Laura, supposedly my student in astrology, has recently introduced me to.]

Freedom at all costs, even at the price of ridicule and emptiness.

Lilith emphasizes the principles of the Aquarius – freedom and autonomy. This easily causes problems in life because these people avoid strong and lasting connections. They do not experience their lives, they feel as if they see their life thorough a wall of glass because they are not able to experience their life emotionally. They do not trust themselves and they do not trust others. The way out is through the opposite sign, Leo – to open their heart, connect their mind with their heart and in this way gain the ability to experience life.

Beware of injuries to ankles, calves and shins.

Lilith (True) in the 8th House

Even though Lilith was not strongly aspected during this announcement, Lilith is “up” for humanity at this time. From autoimmune diseases, the MeToo movement, the Kavanaugh hearings, the Women’s March + the Right to Life March in DC at the same time,  plus the volatile reactivity of our times, Lilith is all over the place. She plays a prominent role in both President Trump’s and Hillary Clinton’s natal charts, and she’s kind of the Mad Woman in the Attic screaming across the past several years. In order for full healing to occur, we will need to address and integrate this Shadow figure. The rewards for integration will be a restored Earth, a return to natural healing, and a balance between sovereignty and tyranny. Inner peace with the wild woman and a healing of PTSD will be much needed as more true stories surface.

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HEADS UP! Astrology of Today’s Upcoming 3 PM “Major Announcement”

Update: Laura Bruno has alerted me that the time will be 4 pm rather than 3 pm, putting Chiron on the Midheaven and Saturn on the Descendant, she says. I haven’t had time to look at it, but will definitely tune in at 4 p.m. Thanks, Laura!

Of course I couldn’t resist setting up the chart for this event “ahead” of time. Now, with only three hours remaining until the event, I finally get around to posting it. And predictably, it’s a doozy, indeed looks so remarkable that if I didn’t know better, I’d think President Trump worked with an astrologer to set up the exquisite timing of this event. Why do I say that? Because warrior Mars, which rules the head, in Aries since January 2, and pressing towards a square with Saturn in bureaucratic Capricorn ever since, WILL FINALLY ARRIVE: Today courageous Mars at 12° clicks onto exact square with stuck, bureaucratic Saturn at 13°.

This begins the most intense aspect of the Mars/Saturn/Pluto drama. Because from today on, through the first week of February, Mars will be pressing into its square with Pluto, at 21° Capricorn, reaching exactness for that aspect on February 2. This double whammy (Mars to Saturn, then Mars to Pluto) will prove to be a climactic test of Mars warrior energy as it faces down and fuels, and hopefully, begins to decapitate the wrongful use of Pluto’s primal power for good or ill.

See Pluto as “Deep State” Goliath, experiencing the ramifications of a single stone thrown by tiny David. Or let’s say, two stones! Mars to Saturn, then Mars to Pluto.

There’s much more to say about this chart.

•  Moon at 10° Cancer and in the first house, beginning to form a T-cross with Mars and Saturn, intensifying the Mars/Saturn struggle: Trump presents himself as the head of the American family, calling upon the warmth and bonding of family, home, community;

• Mars near Eris, that little body recently discovered with an enormously long cycle, and thus operating within the collective unconscious of all of humanity, which was  named after the “Discontented Goddess”: the ramifications of whatever DJT announces will reverberate globally;

• Neptune is just past the Midheaven path, calling upon compassion and imagination and rising above party politics as never before.

•  Venus at 13° Sagittarius closing in on Jupiter at 15° Sagittarius: valuing (Venus) Truth, big perspectives, a widened understanding (Jupiter);

• Mercury at 22° Capricorn, separating from an exact conjunction with primal Pluto: it may be that this decision (whatever it is)  climaxed within the past few days.

• Sun at 29°26 Capricorn: this event takes place just as the Sun, in the final karmic degree of Capricorn, and the month-long struggle over the shutdown, plus walls, borders, structures (all Capricorn), exits for the next sign Aquarius, hopefully to invoke our humanity, whatever that may portend.



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Alt-Epistemology: Remarkable “assisted migration” of clones from ancient redwoods brings up a host of questions

One of the ever-present disputes in permaculture is whether or not “invasive species” are to be avoided or eradicated. Just the very name “invasive,” of course, brands them as “bad”; on the other hand, as Peter Bane, my permaculture teacher, put it, “plants move.” If they don’t move suddenly, introduced by wind, fire, water, birds, animals, or humans, either inadvertently or by design, they do move gradually, depending on all sorts of factors, including climate change. And when they do (seem to) “suddenly” appear in a new environment, humans tend to lament that they “take over” and “crowd out” species we call “native,” — at least for a while, even for decades, until the ecosystem naturally rebalances itself.

Clearly, the Angel Ancient Tree Archive comes down on one side of this dispute, not just by re-introducing ancient redwoods to where they were before, but introducing them to new areas in “assisted migration.”

There are other assumptions buried in this audacious, thought-provoking project, and who knows really, whether or not they are TRUE. Here are two assumptions that I find both provocative AND questionable:

  1. The climate is warming. Google “climate warming exopermaculture” and you will come upon a host of discussions that address this question — plus the political and geo-political agendas that may be driving humans to “beLIEve” in it. Here’s an example.

Is the Global Climate Changing, and If So, How? Meanwhile: Welcome to “Precarity”

Some people, like Clif High, think the climate is about to enter a massive cooling period, indeed a new mini Ice Age. True? I have no idea; but notice that this assumption is the exact opposite of the much more common “climate warming” mantra of Guy McPherson, who, by the way, Carol Rosin has just interviewed again “

Google “Guy McPherson “exopermaculture” and you will find many articles addressing Guy’s “take” on the future.

There’s a reason Guy is called “Mr. Doomer”! On the other hand, Clif High’s “take” on the future might have equally drastic repercussions for the survival of the human race.

BTW: There are variations on the above assumption. For example, some people say that human industrial activity is not the primary driver for climate warming, because the whole solar system is warming. True? Again, I have no idea.

  2. “Too much” carbon dioxide in the atmosphere is bad

I’m sure you’ve seen the 360° number bandied about as the “safe” number of parts per million for CO2 in the atmosphere. Here’s a screenshot:

But here’s an article that directly contradicts this assumption:

CO2 myth exposed: Why we need more carbon dioxide to grow food and forests

TRUE? Again, I have no idea. My only purpose here is to expose commonly held assumptions we make that not only drive our beLIEfs, but that also drive action, including this amazingly farseeing project to regrow, and introduce redwood forests on planet Earth.

P.S. What I do very much love about the redwoods project is that it is thinking in Native American terms, hoping to be looking after the “7th generation” of our children’s children. That overall vision in itself, is laudable, whether or not the climate is really cooling, or really warming, or whether or not there can be “too much” carbon dioxide in the air.

Please note: I’m not dissing the project, I’m just looking at this entire question from an alt-epistemological point of view, aiming to help us see that everything we think, no matter how obviously “true” it seems at the time, is based on assumptions that, if we go back far enough, cannot be proven, but “rest on nothing.” Which is why it’s best to keep our minds open to further possibilities.

Arborists Are Bringing the Dinosaur of Trees Back to Life



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Alt-Epistemology: What is “the edge,” and why do we need it?

Thanks to a reader who today commented her appreciation of  this 2015 post, I decided to post it again, and add the word “Alt-Epistemology” to the title. Because that is, what it is!



I am an “edge” person. Edgy. Allergic to rules.

Not by choice, but by necessity. I tried very hard to “fit in” to the academic monoculture, where divergent thinking and feeling was frowned upon. I tried hard to keep on all the masks that were programmed into me. But, in the end — hell, in the beginning! in the very beginning of my so-called “career” — I failed.

Somehow, I knew I would fail. I knew that I wouldn’t be able to “teach logic,” when I had already recognized that logic is a tiny linear trap that pretends to create or mirror “cause and effect” where there is none; where, actually, everything in the universe — both internal and external — rises, and falls, together. All of it, the whole damn thing, “co-dependent arising,” interconnected, interwoven, on not just this plane but infinite others. There is no abstraction, and no separation except that we make it so. We make it all up!

My little dog is attracted to edges, too. Every time we go on a walk, he’s off running the edges — of grass where it meets bushes, or a building. He knows that there’s more life to be found there, in that place where different elements, species, ecosystems, patterns, whatever! meet and intersect. He knows instinctively. I do too, when I remember to forget my learned linear logic, and just move to the music of the inner/outer being as she unfurls, moment by moment, following the undulating flow of the breath.

My “position” on the edge has immense advantages. First of all, those who are “inside” whatever too right box they find themselves in (usually of “employment,” or “school,” or “marriage”), tend to seem to need my counsel. “How do I see/feel this situation I’m in without going crazy?” I translate that question to: “How do I both live inside it and not be of it at once?”

My response? In every situation, cultivate the witness, the observing consciousness, AWARENESS. No matter how identified you tend to be with this or any situation whether you feel it as good (attractive) or bad (repellent), pay attention: NOTICE how you are perceiving and feeling at any point in the process. Learn to wake up, right in the middle of your identification with the drama, whatever it is, if possible before its “logic” —its unstated rules about what the choices are, and they’re usually binary, contradictory — grabs you and tries to force you to choose “one or the other” course and act on that choice. This sounds easy. It’s very difficult. Difficult to catch yourself in the momentum of the rush of an idea that near-simultaneously triggers a feeling that moves you into action. Difficult to slow down enough to feel your way into the interstices of the flashing moment.

As for those so-called binary choices: please realize — it’s NEVER one or the other. Never! Get that. It’s always this, this still point, the point within which you can center yourself, and the center of which opens into spaciousness, where anything is possible, anything! From the linear line that features two poles at opposite ends, we graduate to recognizing any point on a line as it blooms into space. For a point itself, has no dimension! So that when we look at any single point close to, it opens! We fall through into the void. Into presence. Possibility. Magic and miracle.

The result? Every single point — of perception, of awareness —is itself an edge, a multidimensional edge, where we teeter into the unbounded, bountiful spaciousness of whatever happens next. Whatever happens next as we breathe our way through the present moment, paying attention to the edge of our breath as it flows in and out, opening, closing, living, dying, expanding, contracting. There is no end to the edge. The edge, from any point of view, is there, here, like your life.

Admittedly, this little rant on “the edge” is epistemological. In permacultural terms, it might be called a riff on “Zone Zero Zero.” Here’s a more prosaic “permacultural” contemplation of “edge.”

Why Is the Edge So Damned Important?


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Some possible ramifications of the longest ever USG “shutdown”: Trump’s “trap”? (What about the SES?) — and more

I notice that the remarkable anonymous message about the benefits of the USG shutdown that I included in yesterday’s post

I’m a senior Trump Official, and I hope a long shutdown smokes out the resistance

— has not only gone viral on twitter, but was included, sometimes word for word, in yesterday’s videos from alternative commentators I pay attention to, including X22 Report, Praying Medic, and Truth and Art TV.

Not having ever worked in a bureaucracy myself, but having friends who have, or who do, it’s been clear to me for a long time that plenty of workers wile away their “time” there on screen, surfing or searching the internet for their own purposes, all the while pretending to be “working.”

That article briefly touched on a subject that is now being fleshed in:

Trump’s Shutdown Trap!

Yep. Three days to go — until the shutdown has been in force for 30 days, legally sanctioning “Reduction in Force” —  and counting.

No wonder I’m noticing the DJT chesire cat grin more these days.

My question, can SES (Senior Executive Service) members also be “furloughed”? I seem to remember aim4truth talked about this at length (a few months ago?), saying that not only can they not be fired, but that they are shuffled around to head up lots of departments and agencies without necessarily having the required expertise, that they much higher salaries than the usual gov employee, and that they retire at the same high pay scale. I just briefly skimmed through a pdf on the SES, and notice that they can be fired for poor performance, though, of course, it’s a “process.” (See first article, above.)

Basics of Federal Government’s Senior Executive Service

One glaring question: who chooses the SES people in the first place?

So much begins to happen when we begin to zero in on what we used to take for granted! Think about it, how we intensely creative humans first imagine, and then materialize, like magic! — both  visible and invisible structures (Saturn/Pluto again). Some of these structures then grow to enormous weight and power without our hardly noticing it. Such structures, once they’re up and running, feel inevitable, eternal, much like day following night, spring following winter, death following birth, sunflowers turning to follow the sun. But they’re not! Our human-constructed structures, which, by their very nature, tend to grow bigger and more unwieldy over time, don’t obey nature’s primal law of death and rebirth — until they do! All of a sudden we notice their slow-motion decay; all of a sudden all our efforts to shore them up fail. All of a sudden what seemed immutable, crumbles and falls. And not necessarily because somebody “caused” it (like the three World Trade Center buildings of 9/11), but because, yep, let’s face it, entropy rules, at least at this level, within any artificially closed framework that we tend to identify with.





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