I need to take my internet addiction seriously . . .

AK, at 18 months? Still in my essence. Want to get back there, and stay there . . .

I was going to start today’s postings with something on today’s Occupy Wall Street action, plus something about Johan Callemann’s interpretation of going into the Seventh Day, Sixth Night — or is it Sixth Day, Seventh Night? I’m too wasted to look it up — of his (October 28, 2011) version of the Mayan Calendar, but . . . hell, go google them yourself! I’m beat, fatigued, worn out by my left brain’s need to keep flogging itself into figuring out what’s going on while pretending(?) to be in the right brain flow of the current of being.

My addiction to providing others with a certain multidimensional window on the internet has found me today acutely aware, once again, of my addictive personality. At least I don’t smoke cigarettes anymore. But this, this! Alas!

I discovered the depths of my internet addiction a few weeks ago when my connection went down, and of course, drove immediately to an internet cafe down the road and to blog about it. But that disconnect wasn’t voluntary. I need to do a voluntary break, with no particular “reason” or “excuse,” except knowing that going to the local Lotus Festival this afternoon and evening, and working in the garden all day tomorrow will do me a world of good!

But wait a minute, isn’t that just more “doing,” more plugging myself into one project or another? Is this how I gain my “value”? Do I have to work hard to be of worth? Do my German genes rule?

I confess, I’m scared. Scared that I won’t make it through the weekend. Scared that I’ll find myself anxious, confused, at loose ends, unable to be.

One compromise: I’ve agreed with myself that I will be allowed to take notes — by hand. No computer, no iphone, no ipad. Nada. Until Monday morning.

Meanwhile, FYI, there are now 773 posts on this site. Can you believe? In not quite seven months. Most of them still relevant. So if you hanker for more, there’s always more.

Until then, blessings!

This entry was posted in unity consciousness, waking up, zone zero zero. Bookmark the permalink.

5 Responses to I need to take my internet addiction seriously . . .

  1. Pam says:

    My hubby and I just found your site a few days ago from a friend on Facebook! We are so enjoying it, but we do know where you are coming from and asking all the right questions too lately…is that part of the Mayan calendar too….lol! But seriously we do know where you are coming from….sending you healing and love and a BIG thank you for all that you do and put into your site! Enjoy your weekend! 🙂

  2. Susan McElroy says:

    Ann, stop thinking so much! You are tiring me out! When that inner German kicks in, just tell her, “thank you for sharing…” and go watch your goldfish for awhile. It will do you a world of good.

  3. Nancy Frieden says:

    annie… i love the picture of that little girl….it is you …i see the eyes….i think….well…you are beautiful….as a baby and still now…do you have a boa …when oh when are we ever going to get together again… nancy xoxoxox

  4. mmm says:

    I find that leaving the internet for a while can be a very great restorer of health & sanity! Though I enjoy all of your informative posts and your keen eye for the ones you do pick from all of the mish-mash available out there. But yes! Enjoy your beautiful garden.. your heart & love are much more important! Thank-You.

  5. I agree, Ann. Take as much time for yourself as you need…we will be here, continually and gratefully thankful to you for all that you do, while also understanding that caring for yourself has to come first. Can’t take care of the world without taking care of #1! ;D

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *